I'm going to get a tattoo today!!

I'm super excited, I am getting "m'aimer pour qui je suis" on my shoulder!!
(It means love me for who I am.) I'm also getting a double helix piercing!!
Do any of my readers have any tips for a girl getting her first tat?
I didn't even talk to D yesterday so I don't have any updates, he's currently
at a training camp so I'll probably get to start talking to him again in the next few
days! Going days without talking to him makes me kinda crazy, I worry so much..
I know he's safe, but idk..I guess the fact that he's in the military puts that scared
thought in the back of my head.
Also, today is my payday...so shopping here I come!!
Feel free to email us at: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com
check out our facebook at: http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend
Follow us on twitter at: @Willis_Lacey
Follow us on pinterest at: http://pinterest.com/laceyyyy
 Also, if you are interested in being a guest blogger, send me an email!
If you have already recieved your questionnaire, get it filled out and returned
to me ASAP so we can schedule your guest blog.
Next Monday's guest blogger will be Emilie so tune in Monday morning to read
her blog!! :)

I have a surprise!

I'm going to start featuring a new guest blogger every Monday! If you are
interested in applying, please email me at: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com
Here's how it will work:
You send me an email letting me know that you are interested, I will send you
a questionnaire, fill it out & return it, then I will contact you with scheduling information.
If you are chose to be a guest blogger, additional information will be provided.
You will be given full credit for your blog post, and will be notified if any
part of your blog is edited.

With that said, send me those emails! I'm interested in hearing from all sorts of
people, military significant others, and even people who have served in the military
or are currently serving!

On a different note, after talking last night, I think that D has decided that he
doesn't want to make a career out of the Air Force. Who knows though
really, he changes his mind 850 times a minute. I can honestly say that tech
school has been harder than basic was, we can actually talk and argue!!
Haha, not that we argue a whole lot. Oh yeah, and another surprise ladies.
;) Prepare yourselves for girly screams.

Check out The Diary on facebook: http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend

Email us at: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com

Follow us on twitter: @willis_lacey

Follow us on pinterest: http://pinterest.com/laceyyyy

Days 28, 29, and 30, your happiness is not more important.

Let me rant for a minute, my airman treats me like his happiness
is more important than mine, and it in fact, isn't. not one
bit. Just because he is in the military doesn't make him
more important than me. I stay home, I wait on him..I don't have
to. Supporting him is like a full time job on top of my own job,
it's not easy, it's never been easy. So why does he get to act
like I do nothing, like his happiness is more important than mine.
Doesn't it matter what I want? Does my hopes and dreams for the
future even matter to him anymore? I don't even know. He acts
like I'm no where near as important as him and then pretends
to be all sweet and acts offended when I finally get pissed about
it. Okay, rant over.
This weekend was of course, uneventful. We texted mostly and
played words with friends. (By the way, great game to play with
your Airman while he is away..as long as you both have Android
powered phones or iPhones.) He finally read a little bit of
this blog, my wonderful baby..he didn't seem impressed. Leave it
to a man. I love this blog, I love the wonderful people that
I have met through this blog, and I never want to give it up.
There's nothing like being in a military relationship, it's
something that words can never describe, and when you start
arguing with all this distance between you, it's so hard to deal.
It's like your ability to function is just taken from you,
I'll be honest, we've argued like crazy lately, over everything.
We are driving each other crazy, I can't sleep or eat...I feel
terrible. I hate arguing with all of this distance between us,
it's so hard. As always, all of you wonderful people can contact
me through email: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com OR facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend OR twitter:
@willis_lacey

Day 25, it's constant irritation.

I find myself getting constantly irritated with my bf, I know he is busy, I really do.
But is it that hard to text me back when he is off duty? I seriously get irritated with
him, it's ridiculous for him to take hours to text me back while he is off duty. I
know that he wants to spend time with his friends and such, but damn..I wait
all damn day to hear from him. I want to say a special thank you to the ladies who
emailed me last night with useful information about marraige in the USAF, it was
a big help!! I'm also doing a little research on my own, and I will be putting a
blog up with the information that I find here in a few days!! I'm getting super
excited about planning my trip to Lackland (the second time!!), I can't wait
until I get to order all of my tickets and such. :) I've had a few ladies email
me from addresses that have return emails blocked, so I am sorry if I haven't
replied, but I kinda can't. If you don't hear from me, send me a message on
facebook. :) As always, you can email me at: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com
or check out The Diary's facebook page at: http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend
or now you can even follow me on twitter: @willis_lacey
Thank you for all of your continued support!!

Day 17, one more week. :)

I can't believe he'll be home in one more week, I'm pretty excited. I'll get 12 days with
him. 12 whole freaking days...it's so weird, we used to spend every single day together
and now I'm excited for only 12 days. Haha, what is really going to suck is the three
months that he goes back for tech school. I know I've been really lucky though, I've
got to talk to him and see him more than most people. Like his graduation, he got an
extra day because of Thanksgiving, and it hasn't even been a month since I was in
Texas. I guess I should count my blessings, I know a lot of my readers will be
spending this holiday season without their Airman and my heart goes out to each
and every one of you. You can email me or message me on facebook if you need
someone to talk to; I usually get back to emails and messages pretty quick, at least
I try to. I hope everyone is doing good today. :)
Email me at: diaryofanairforcegirlfriend@aol.com
or facebook me at: http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend

Air Force Girlfriend Designs. :)

Gonna start doing more of these, I love putting my computer genius to use. :)
I'm even going to start doing personalized ones so if you'd like send me
an email: Laceylovesdukex3@aol.com or contact me via facebook at:
http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend

Day 11, "You know what would make you feel better?"

Last night despite the fact that he was in a terrible mood, we talked for like an
hour and a half. He said that he is absolutely would not take me on a carriage
ride, so everytime he would start talking about how he is in a terrible mood,
I'd answer with: "You know what would make you feel better? Taking me on
a carriage ride." Although I am completely kidding, I could careless if he takes
me on a carriage ride, I was just giving him a hard time. So I think I'm pretty
much decided on sexy Mrs. Clause, almost every single email I got voted for
Mrs. Clause so I'm excited to go get my little costume. :) I do believe my
airman will love it. Of course he will love any outfit as long as I'm in it. :)
<3

Day 9, he apologizes...

This morning he called me and apologized for not being able to talk to me much. It was really sweet, it made my day...even though I am sick and couldn't even go
to work. I'm so excited....14 days. :) I hope I'm better by then, heading to the doctor
again today to go get some more testing done to see what is going on and why this
antibiodic isn't helping. I want some chicken noodle soup. Also, I want to address
something that has been bothering me. Military significant others (girlfriends AND
wives) should support each other, we are all fighting the same fight so why tear
each other down? All of our men are fighting for the same thing, so why are we
arguing amongst each other? Yes, I'm a military girlfriend, I'm not a wife, there is
not a ring on my finger. BUT I love my airman more than I love myself, I've been
with him for 4 years. It would KILL me if something happened to him just like it
would if I were his wife, it hurts me that we spend so much time apart just like it
would if I were his wife, I worry about him and his safety every single day just like
it would if I were his wife, and I love him with my entire heart just like I would if I
were his wife. So why are we spending so much time judging each other and sticking
our noses in the air? We're doing the same thing just in a different way. Thank you
everyone for all your continued support, as always feel free to email me at:
laceylovesdukex3@aol.com or contact me through our facebook page:
http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend

Days 6, 7, and 8.I'm begining to like this.

It's not as good as seeing him every day, but being able to hear his voice every day is
pretty awesome. :) I still wish I was in San Antonio, I loved San Antonio...I belong in
Texas. I'm having a weak day today, I've been really sick and I literally just feel like
laying around all day. I'm surprised I even got out of the bed today, this bronchitis is
kicking my ass. It is so great waking up to texts and phone calls from my Airman, even
if he blows my phone up when I'm at work. I prefer my phone ringing off the hook more
than no contact at all. I have like 14 days until he's coming home for Christmas<3
Yay for spending Christmas with my Airman! :) I know some of my fellow military
girlfriends/wives will be spending this Christmas without their military man so I know that
I am truly blessed to have him this holiday season. My heart goes out to the families
that will be spending the holidays without their loved ones, I can't imagine the feeling.
Always know that I am here to offer advice for you, you can email me at
Laceylovesdukex3@aol.com or you can contact me through the Diary of an Air
Force Girlfriend facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend

Day 5, I'm sick and I need to be loved on.

“In times of grief and sorrow I will hold you and rock you and take your grief and make it my own. When you cry I cry and when you hurt I hurt. And together we will try to hold back the floods to tears and despair and make it through the potholed street of life”



He's all the way in Texas, he can't love on me if he is in Texas. :( I need to be taken care
of right now. :( I hate this being apart thing, it's terrible. Stupid doctor put me on these
very strong antibiodics and now my stomach is killing me. But on another note, I'm going
Christmas shopping today and I'm super excited. I don't know what to get my Airman
for Christmas, I want it to be special. Like super special, I want it to be something he
looks at and is like awww. I want it to be something he never wants to be without.
email me your ideas at laceylovesdukex3@aol.com or post them to Diary of an
Air Force Girlfriends facebook page! www.facebook.com/diaryofanairforcegirlfriend
(did I forget to mention that we have expanded to facebook?) I highly encourage
you guys to join on facebook, I hate that I'm the only person that get's to have contact
with you guys. You could offer each other a lot of support. :) I'm so excited, 18 days
until I will be in my lovers arms again. I told him that I am going to attack him in the
airport and make a big scene. :) I cannot wait. Last night I did the cutest thing, I took
a deck of cards and on each one I wrote one reason why I love him...so now I have
52 reasons why I love him and I'm mailing them to him this weekend in his care package.
I hope he likes it.<3

Day 4, I HATE tech school, but I kinda love it.

It's hard getting used to being able to hear from him every day, because it's not very
dependable contact. We'll be talking and then he abruptly has to end the conversation
because he has to get something done. (details, pick up school supplies, ect.) He has
this newfound freedom and it scares the hell out of me, I know this is normal. I'm just
afraid he's going to do something stupid and mess his career up, or worse, our
relationship. It's really hard for me to accept that his job ALWAYS comes before me,
even though I've been around since before he started with the Air Force. I'm proud of
him, I'm proud of the sacrifices he's making to protect our country, but it is hard.
I love this man so I'm willing to endure it, the pain, the heartache, and even the lonely
nights. But that's all a part of being a military s/o, I have to put on my big girl panties
and deal with it. I have 19 days until he comes home for Christmas!! 19 days until
I get to cuddle with him OVERNIGHT, yes OVERNIGHT!!!! I will be able to lay
my head on his chest and sleep, I'll be able to play tug of war over the blankets again,
I'll be able to nudge him because his snoring is RIDICULOUS. I can't wait until
I get to ride in his truck and roll my eyes at his god awful singing. I love this boy,
and I'm so excited to see him again. <3

Day 3, this is so much different than what I expected.

"You are my best friend as well as my lover, and I do not know which side of you
I enjoy the most. I treasure each side, just as I have treasured our life together."

I worry too much. I never thought I would spend the entire time he's in Tech School
worrying about him, but I am. I'm afraid he's going to get in trouble. When he texts
me I worry about if anyone else is going to see it, I find myself thinking really hard
about what I'm going to say back. I'm so paranoid about this. All he talks about is
how all the females are desperate whores and they are trying to get attention from
anyone that will give it to them. I know he only tells me this because he wants me to
trust him completely and he doesn't want to have secrets, but it REALLY doesn't make
me feel better. I love my boyfriend, I've been with this kid for like 4 years, 2 of which
I've known he was going to be in the military. This is harder than anything I ever imagined,
it's so hard to stay strong when he's halfway across the country. Part of me wants to cry
and beg him to come home every single time he calls, I know he can't come home, I
know he's trying to protect our country, and I know I have years of deployments,
holidays spent apart, and weeks without contact in my future. When he was sworn in
I made the decision to stay in this mans life, I made this decision knowing that he was
going to make a career out of the Air Force. We have 5 years until he signs the papers again,
19 years until he is supposed to retire, but even after that, he'll probably stay in...he loves
it so far. I love this man, I love the sacrifice he's willing to make to not only ensure that we
have a good future, but also to protect his country. Being a military girlfriend is so much more
than just supporting him, it's dealing with the fact that you don't get to have a say, you don't
have the option of moving in with him, it's dealing with the fact that because you don't have a
ring on your finger you don't have any rights when it comes to your military man. I love this man,
this man is my best friend, the love of my life, and my hero, I'd never give up on him. I get out
of bed every single morning and fight so he'll be proud. He honestly puts the smile on my face,
the light in my eyes, and the love in my heart. He still hasn't had the chance to read this blog,
but I'm pretty sure he will love it. <3

Day 52, I'm having fun :)

Now that the end of BMT is near, I'm finally able to let go and have fun because I know in
just a few short days I am going to be reunited with my love<3 In the past few days I
have been very upbeat and excited. I feel so much less stress now. It's great knowing
that BMT is almost over, I can't wait. I am going to have so much to be thankful for
this Thanksgiving. 4 days until my flight leaves for San Antonio, 4 days until I begin this
long journey into being an Air Force girlfriend. I'm nervous but I have a wonderful support
system. <3

Day 51, this is how I'm going to spend the rest of my life?

Thank you so much to all the awesome people that I have met through this blog! Just yesterday
I found an awesome group on facebook that I wish I had discovered earlier, it's called Airman
Swag, this group is great and I was immediately welcomed in! I highly encourage all of my readers
that are on facebook to check it out! Thank you to Airman Swag, Military Issued Girlfriends, my
friends, my family, and my boyfriends family! I've loved hearing from all of you, and I highly
encourage you to send emails to Laceylovesdukex3@aol.com or send me a private message
on facebook. Anything you tell me or ask advice about is completely confedential. I love all the
feedback and I can't wait to hear from more of you.

But anyways, this whole experience has been very difficult for me to deal with and the past 8
weeks have been some of the hardest of my life. In 5 short days I will be reunited with my best
friend and my love. I know that fighting this battle will be completely worth it when I finally get
to be in his arms again. My life is turning out to be completely different than what I expected,
I'm a military girlfriend...I'm an AIR FORCE girlfriend, and I'm so proud. I love telling people how
amazingly proud I am of my boyfriend. When I get to San Antonio, my life is going to change forever,
being a military girlfriend will finally be set in stone. This is how I'm going to spend the rest of my life,
living through letters and the occasional phone call, spending months apart from the man I love,
and holding my breath hoping and praying that the day I get to be in his arms again will come quicker.
I can't wait<3

Day 50, a few phone calls this week?

He finally called last night, and he let me know that he is probably going to get
a few phone calls this week. :) That's exciting considering I've barely had any time
to talk to him since he's been gone. I've quit writing letters because it takes about a
week for them to get there. I can't wait. Hopefully it'll be everything I've been hoping
for. I'm so afraid that I will be disappointed when I get down there, although I'm
pretty sure I will be too excited to be disappointed. It's terrible that I won't be
able to hug him or kiss him when I very first see him, I won't even be able to hold
his hand. I think that is going to be the hardest part. But it's all going to be worth
it in the end. It better be.

Day 49, exactly one week to go!!

In one week I will be flying down to Texas! I'm so freaking excited!!! I can
barely sit still thinking about going down there! I can't wait for cuddle time,
oh how I love to cuddle. <3 I'm so excited. :) It'll be great. I love him very
much and I miss him even more. I'm hoping for maybe a letter or phone
call this week. 7 more days:) This trip is so expensive but I have a feeling that
when I get down there it will be so worth it. :)

Days 46, 47, and 48, I'm officially on Ritalin

haha, I know that is completely unrelated to anything..but the stress of this whole
situation has thrown my ADHD all out of whack and now I'm 18 years old and
on freaking Ritalin. I understand how Ritalin works now, it fucks the kids up too
bad for them to be all hyper and jittery. yup, that's how it works. I hate this.
OMFG, I wanna go home and go to sleep, if this phone rings one more time I might
hurt someone, I seriously might need my ADHD symptoms to be in full swing for
me to be able to function at work. I'm going to flip out, right now...I am. But on the
plus side, I have 8 days until I fly to Texas! I am so excited. I didn't even get a phone
call this weekend, which really sucks...maybe he will get to call one day this week,
I'm not sure if he knows my new number yet, but hopefully his parents will give it
to him. I'm going this Friday to get the new iPhone, I'm excited. :) Yay for having
Siri to do stuff for me. :) I'm so excited about Texas!!! I need to pack my bags still,
wooooooo, I can't wait to get to San Antonio. :)

Day 45, Happy Veterans Day!

Thank you to all the men and women who have served our country and the ones who
currently do, especially my Airman, AB Gilreath<3 I'll see you in just a few days babe.

Day 44, getting everything together for my trip...

Planning a trip is stressful, no wonder my parents always hated planning vacations.
I'm ready to get this over with, I'm nervous about flying down there by myself and
stuff. I have to get a taxi by myself, I have to do all sorts of things by myself, it's
awful. I don't wanna grow up and be on my own yet. :( I can't wait to get down
there though, I've heard that San Antonio is gorgeous, and it'll be great to finally
see my Airman after 8 long weeks. I'm ready for cuddle time...cuddle time will
be good. :) I wonder what all we are going to do when I'm down there...I wanna
shop while I'm there, that might piss him off though, he hates to shop. Whatever,
I will drag him anyways and he can buy me pretty things. lmao, jk I have my own
money. :)

Day 43, I'm not even sure what to say...

For like the past twelve hours, I have been at a complete loss for words, I've made like
four life changing decisions and I'm honestly a little scared. But I have come to the
realization that I am the only person who can make me happy. MY happiness is what
is really important, not everyone elses. It's taken me a long time to come to this
conclusion and damn it, I like it. I'm a person with thoughts and feelings, and I'm tired
of no one else realizing that. I'm so sick of people lying to me because they think that's
what would be best for me, how about you let ME decide, it is my life. I'm sick of everytime
I don't kiss everyone else's ass, people get pissed at me, and yet I'm the one getting used
like a doormat 24/7. Forget that, fuck that, I'm done with it. I'm my own fucking person,
now watch me make myself happy. I know that none of my recent posts have really been
about being a military girlfriend, but right now I honestly have some bigger shit going on in
my life...I do miss my Airman, and it will only be 13 days until I see him again. Less than
two weeks and I'm San Antonio bound. :)